You, of course, are beautiful in every single way. You radiate gorgeousness, charm, wit, elegance and allure beyond measure (at least when you’re not picking your nose).
But you might not feel stunning all the time. For those that feel like they’re stuck in their ugly-duckling era, there are endless fads, trends and products that might be thrust their way, from wrinkle-taping to turmeric mouthwash. Such beauty hacks, unfortunately, often have little evidence to back them up.
So, what truly can make you more attractive? And what myths should we all ignore? Here's what science actually suggests. And – spoiler – it mostly involves not being a jerk.
1. Attractiveness truly is relative
The science of attractiveness is a bit of a sticky subject. It has become popular for a certain variety of ‘men with podcasts’ to use, misuse or make up ‘scientific facts’ about what people find attractive – often alongside some, shall we say, outdated takes on gender roles.
But beneath the noise, there is some legitimate scientific field devoted to understanding attraction – one in which psychologists explore the traits we find appealing in romantic and sexual partners.
Dr Ed Morrison, senior lecturer in psychology at the University of Portsmouth, explains that many attractive traits could reflect a person's underlying biology. “That’s the evolutionary theory,” he says. “When you’re picking a mate, you’re assessing their underlying biology: their hormones, their health, and their genes.”
But – and here's the critical point – attractiveness is often not that simple. As senior lecturer in psychology at the University of Essex Dr Veronica Lamarche says, it’s now difficult to fully disentangle biology from culture.
“Attractiveness is somewhat of a subjective experience,” she says. “Certain physical attributes that people rate as attractive might simply reflect traits that are advantageous – or signalled social desirability – at a certain point in time.”
Across cultures and throughout history, beauty has taken many forms – from Chinese foot binding and Japanese teeth blackening, to the elongated skulls valued by ancient Mayans, and the tradition among some women in Tajikistan of accentuating unibrows. While these practices may seem unfamiliar to outsiders, they reflect culturally specific ideals of beauty and identity.
In short, beauty is not universal, objective or unchanging. It’s shaped by culture – and what some people find attractive, others may find confusing.
However, a myriad of studies – mainly done on white, heterosexual people in Europe and North America – have tried to unearth traits that humans generally find attractive. And their findings may sound surprising to some...
2. You're more attractive on a rollercoaster
There is plenty of advice out there for acing the perfect date, but Lamarche says that adding an element of healthy fear or danger could help feelings blossom.
“The classic study was done on a shaky bridge,” says Lamarche – referring to 1974 research. “When on a shaky bridge, people rated another person more attractive because they were misattributing the anxiousness of being on this bridge to how attractive the person asking them questions was.”
This idea is known as the ‘misattribution of arousal’ theory, which suggests that people can mistake physical excitement for romantic attraction. That's why Lamarche recommends taking your date to a theme park or to watch a scary movie (though maybe not both at once).
3. Attraction isn’t about income
Manosphere bros have been known to complain that women are gold diggers, coupling up with men just for their money. However, Lamarche says that many of the studies that came to this conclusion are quite old and reflect the patriarchal realities of their time.
“Picking someone who is able to financially care for you meant something pragmatically different, 50 or 60 years ago,” she says. “In that context, it’s not as superficial as it sounds, when your physical safety and wellbeing are on the line.”
In today's world, there’s no conclusive evidence that wealth is inherently attractive. Your beautifying efforts are probably better spent elsewhere.
4. Vegetables can make you glow
Orange vegetables may seem like a strange route to gorgeousness, but studies show that eating certain plant pigments can improve the appearance of skin.
Carotenoids are antioxidants that can be found in yellow, orange and red plants, including butternut squash, carrots, tomatoes, bell peppers, mangoes and oranges.
Researchers at the University of St Andrews have found that eating more of these foods makes your skin glow with a golden undertone.
“One of the things you might be judging when you’re seeing somebody’s skin is their underlying health,” says Morrison. Some studies artificially alter photos of faces to subtly adjust skin colour, he says, and then they ask people to rate these faces’ attractiveness.
“Whatever skin colour your participants have, making them a little bit more yellow – indicating good diet – makes them reliably more attractive,” he suggests.
5. Physical appearance matters far less than you'd think (especially if you're a man)
Despite what the gym bros might tell you, physical appearance is not the be-all and end-all of attractiveness – especially, according to Morrison, when it comes to heterosexual men.
“The general pattern is that physical traits are more important to men than they are to women,” he says. “It’s not the biggest difference in the world, but it’s a reliable pattern that we see across cultures.”
Meanwhile, he says, women tend to be “less interested in physical attractiveness on its own,” putting more emphasis on personality traits instead.
Lamarche says that for everyone, “people are not just prioritising how hot someone is,” and going after the most physically attractive people they can find.
“Partners tend to match really well on attractiveness,” she says. “If you get independent people to rate two partners, they’ll probably rate their attractiveness as similar, which suggests that people are matching, rather than levelling up.”
6. Just be a nice person
The most important attractive trait of all, that both Lamarche and Morrison say is universally true, is just being nice.
“People want caring partners; they want someone they feel they can trust,” says Lamarche. “That’s the biggest influence on attractiveness.”
Across cultures, people want someone who is kind, trustworthy, intelligent, reliable and honest, Lamarche and Morrison say – while traits like aggression are generally considered unattractive.
And make sure you’re a good friend to those closest to you. According to the proximity principle, “we tend to be more attracted to people who exist closer to us,” says Lamarche.
“The more exposure we get to someone, the more likely we are to find them attractive or interesting.”
Morrison adds: “There’s no super-secret technique that I’ve come across to make you suddenly more attractive.
“The main thing you can change is how you present yourself. If you want to make yourself attractive, that’s probably the best thing to do. Be charming and nice and funny, because that definitely works well.”
Read more:
- What makes someone objectively beautiful?
- 17 reasonably romantic questions you asked us about the science of love (and sex)
- The neuroscience of beauty: What your brain finds beautiful – and how this shapes your thoughts
About our experts
Dr Ed Morrison is a senior lecturer and PhD supervisor at the University of Portsmouth. He is interested in evolutionary approaches to behaviour, as a member of the Centre for Comparative and Evolutionary Psychology. Morrison's research focuses on human mate choice, especially movement and facial attractiveness.
Dr Veronica Lamarche is a senior lecturer at the University of Essex's Department of Psychology. She completed her PhD in Social-Personality Psychology in 2017 at the University of Buffalo, New York. Lamarche's research focuses on understanding how people regulate trust and dependence in their romantic relationships, and how feelings of uncertainty or vulnerability can influence relationship stability.
